People, I am heading to India.
The application has been approved, the emails have been sent, the flight ticket has been booked, the visa has been sorted. There’s no turning back now – one month in Rishikesh, 200 hours of intense yoga teacher training and a major shift in perspective.
As some of you may already know, yoga has been in and out of my life for the last three years or so. Thanks to some inspiring teachers (Jaclyn, Iris, Melissa – I thank you), I’ve managed to hold on to why I started yoga in the first place – to give me peace of mind, a healthy body and an inspired soul.
My relationship with yoga has been as illuminating as it has been challenging. There were moments where there was total clarity and others where my heart felt it was broken, only for me to realise that it was my ego being trampled on by my inability to fully embrace an asana (yoga pose).
Fear, self-doubt and a bruised ego does not a yogi make. And so I learn. And so I continue.
“Are you sure?” turns into a mantra for me from time to time. (Image credit : TeenyTinyOm)
Things started to unravel when the yoga centre I frequented closed. The home practice I started on shortly after was alright, but it wasn’t great. I could never find the consistency I needed.
I attended yoga retreats, workshops and even a festival to help tide me over until my next meeting with my yoga mat. I was on a veritable yogic roller coaster!
It took me a few more months of inconsistency and uncertainty before I decided that I needed to change; before I lose faith in yoga, before I lose faith in myself, I needed to do something.
It then came to me – a yoga teacher training course.
I am still not sure what set it off, but I got it into my head that this course will instill in me a discipline, a deeper love and understanding of yoga, far beyond what I may think I need.
The great sage Patanjali once wrote, “When you are inspired by some great purpose, some extraordinary project, all your thoughts break their bonds: Your mind transcends limitations, your consciousness expands in every direction, and you find yourself in a new, great and wonderful world. Dormant forces, faculties and talents become alive, and you discover yourself to be a greater person by far than you ever dreamed yourself to be.”
I guess you could say my great purpose for the next month would be to immerse myself wholly in this wondrous journey of truth, belief and love.
The training will be challenging on all levels and there will be days where a few tears may be shed (and a few curse words uttered!). Somehow, I believe I will come away from this experience with a spirited heart, clarity of mind and a stronger sense of self.
I also believe that my love for yoga will transcend my struggles with it. And I will finally allow it to be a bigger part of my life, naturally and without expectations.
See you all on the other side of India. ‘Til I blog again…Namaste.